Sayings and Quips: 24

I am a nobody nobody is perfect therefore I am per

I am glad I bumped into you today

I am not tense just terribly terribly alert

I did it my way

I do not care I do not have to

I do not know how to break this to you but

I do not suffer from insanity I enjoy every minute

I go from zero to bitch in 3 5 seconds

I always knew that this could happen

I always say kill them with kindness

I am a a porker

I am a all that

I am a all twitter pated

I am a an open book

I am a loose cannon

I am a psychic amnesiac I know in advance what I a

I am all ears

I am all over that like a duck on a junebug

I am all over that like a fat kid on a smartie

I am all over that like a fly on shit

I am an agent of satan but my duties are largely c

I am as confused as a baby in a topless bar

I am better off alone

I am busier than a one legged riverdancer

I am busier than a one toothed man in a corn on th

I am busier than a ten peckered dog in a hydrant f

I am fine as frogs hair

I am general consensus

I am going bananas

I am going to graduate on time no matter how long

I am going to start thinking positive but I know i

I am gonna clean your clock

I am gonna lay down the law

I am gonna wash that man right outta my hair

I am happily married but the wife is not

I am happy to go down that path

I am hot to trot

I am in hog heaven

I am in shape Round is a shape is is not

I am insurance poor

I am just driving this way to get you mad

I am just working here until a good fast food job

I am looking for something this is my way to find

I am my own redeemer

I am not a complete idiot some parts are missing

I am not a rocket scientist

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals

I am not cheap but I am on special this week

I am not crazy but the voices in my head might be

I am not driving fast just flying low

I am not getting any younger

I am not losing hair I am getting head

I am not my brothers keeper

I am not paranoid they really are after me

I am not single I am romantically challenged

I am not ugly I am visually challenging

I am off like a prom dress

I am okay you are okay

I am on a roll

I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats

I am one with the universe   on a scale from one t

I am only human

I am out of bed and dressed what more do you want

I am out of estrogen and I have a gun

I am out to lunch

I am shitting my head off

I am so hungry I could eat a bear

I am stumpe

I am the best thing since sliced bread

I am the gatekeeper

I am the keymaster

I am trying to imagine you with a personality

I are proud to be a college student

I ate him

I beg to differ

I believe five out of four people have trouble wit

I bet you I could stop gambling

I bought it for a song

I brake for no apparent reason

I busted my hump

I called his bluff

I can dream can not I

I can easily tell when he is lying his lips move

I can feel it in my guts

I can not change the past

I can not complain but sometimes I still do

I can not make heads or tails of it

I can not spell and beer does not help

I can not stand it

I can not tell you what a pleasure its been

I childproofed my house but they still get in

I chose the path less traveled but only because I

I could eat a horse

I could have bought that for a song and dance

I could not care less about apathy

I could notrepair your brakes so I made your horn

I could whip you with one arm tied behind my back

New Section

I did not expect the spanish inquisition

I did not fight my way to the top of the food chai

I did not say it was your fault I said I was blami

I do not give a rats ass

I do not have a solution but I admire the problem

I do not have an attitude problem You have a perce

I do not have to be dead to donate my organ

I do not know him from adam

I do not need kids I married one

I do not put any stock in it

I do not want buns of steel I want buns of cinnamo

I doubt therefore I might be

I drink to make other people interesting

I drive way too fast to worry about cholesterol

I eat swiss cheese but I only nibble on it I make

I eat swiss cheese from the inside out

I feel it in my bones

I feel like I am diagonally parked in a parallel u

I feel like a rat in a cage

I felt bad because I had no shoes until I met a ma

I get enough exercise pushing my luck

I got a gun for my wife best trade I have ever mad



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