Sayings and Quips: 26

I R S  we have got what it takes to take what you

I will go to the foot of our stairs

I will knock you from here to next wednesday

I will leave you with something to chew on

I will not rise to the occasion but I will slide o

I will procrastinate later

I will punch his lights out

I will see you in hell

I will survive

I will show you how the cow eats corn

I wished the buck stopped here as I could use one

I will wear my heart upon my sleeve

I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be withou

I wondered why the frisbee was getting bigger and

I would bet my bottom dollar

I would give my right arm to be ambidextrous

I would buy you a drink but I would be jealous of

I would give you the shirt off his back

I would help you out but I did not see where you c

I would kill for a nobel peace prize

I would like to have more self esteem but I do not

I would lose my head if it was not attached

I would not do that for all the tea in china

I would not be caught dead with a necrophiliac

I would not kick her out of bed for eating cracker

I would not piss down your throat if your lungs we

I would not touch it with a ten foot pole

I would not send a dog out on a night like this

I would rather be a hammer than a nail

I would rather be dead than red

I would rather have a bottle in front of me than a

Ice cold

Icing on the cake

Icy blue eyes

Icy blue

Identity theft

Idiot would try to pass them

Idiot

Idle chitchat

Idle hands are the devils workshop

If I had my druthers

If I could rearrange the alphabet I would put u an

If I look confused it is because I am thinking

If I said you have a beautiful body would you hold

If I melted dry ice could I swim in it and not get

If I throw a stick will you leave

If I were in his shoes

If a book about failures does not sell is it a suc

If Number 2 pencils are the most popular are they

If a camel flies no one laughs if it does not get

If a man with no arms has a gun is he armed

If a parsley farmer is sued do they garnish his wa

If a mute kid swears does his mother wash his hand

If a stealth bomber crashes in a forest will it ma

If a pig loses its voice is it disgruntled

If a thing is worth doing it would have been done

If a tree fell in the forest and no one was around

If a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound

If a turtle does not have a shell is he homeless o

If all else fails manipulate the data

If a two letter word for futility

If all you have is a hammer everything looks like

If anything just cannot go wrong it will anyway

If anything can go wrong it will

If at first you do not succeed blame someone else

If at first you do not succeed call it version 1 0

If at first you do not succeed destroy all evidenc

If at first you do not succeed failure may be your

If at first you do not succeed look in the trash f

If at first you do not succeed give up no use bein

If at first you do not succeed quit do not be a nu

If at first you do not succeed redefine success

If at first you do not succeed skydiving is not fo

If at first you do not succeed then skydiving is n

If at first you do not succeed try a shorter bunge

If at first you do not succeed try left field

If at first you do not succeed try try again

If barbie is so popular why do you have to buy her

If at first you do succeed try not to look astonis

If blind people wear sunglasses why do not deaf pe

If dumb were dirt you would be about an acre

If everybody else jumped off a bridge would you

If everything is relative what is everything else

If evolution is outlawed only outlaws will evolve

If evolution is fact why do mothers only have two

If fed ex and ups were to merge would they call it

If for a tranquil mind you seek

If given a shaft make a car

If god had intended man to smoke he would have set

If god had meant for man to fly he would not have

If god is watching us the least we can do is be en

If his word were a bridge   you would be afraid to

If homosexuality is a disease can I call into work

If ignorance is bliss why are not more people happ

If ifs and buts where candy and nuts every day wou

If ignorance is bliss you must be orgasmic

If it does not come naturally leave it

If it does not kill me it makes me stronger

If it is stupid but works it is not stupid

If it is not one thing it is another

If it is worth doing it is worth doing right

If it was a snake it would have bitten you

If life is like a stage I want better lighting

If it were not for bad luck I would have no luck a

If love is blind why is lingerie so popular

If looks could kill

If music be the food of love play on

If man evolved from apes why do we still have apes

If nothing else I can always serve as a bad exampl

If one synchronized swimmer drowns do the rest hav

If our knees bent the other way what would a chair

If practice makes perfect and nobody is perfect wh

If practice makes perfect how do you explain taxi

If shit were concrete you it would be I80

If swimming is so good for your figure how do you

It is better to be alone than wish you were

If the early bird catches the worm what about the



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