Designs for the Geek/Techy.

I Give 100% At Work!

I Give 100% At Work!
I Give 100% At Work, 100% Effort! Show everyone just how hard you work at your job.

It's Not Impossible, It Just Costs More!

It's Not Impossible, It Just Costs More!
It's Not Impossible, It Just Costs More! If you've got the cash, you can make almost anything happen.

A

A "C" Programmer's Moral
A "C" Programmer's Moral: Two Longs Don't Make A Byte. It's an inside joke, what can I say?

If I'm So Smart...

If I'm So Smart...
If I'm So Smart, Why Do I Work Here? Don't you wonder this sometimes?

I Rite Code

I Rite Code
I'm A Programmar, I'm A Programer, I'm A Programor, I Rite Code. Brag about your job!

Geek vs Normal

Geek vs Normal
The Difference Between A Geek and A Normal Person. Geeks just think differently from other people. This cartoon clearly illustrates that difference.

To-Do List:

To-Do List:
To-Do List. Plan your day carefully, include all your regular activities: read email, play solitaire and Second Life, surf the web, go to lunch, take a break, attend a meeting...

Don't Panic!

Don't Panic!
Don't Panic! Wait, You Have Windows? Okay, Panic! Keeping control of your emotions when you have computer problems is always difficult. Having Windows as your OS doesn't help.

Yes, Ask Me ($100)

Yes, Ask Me ($100)
Yes, You Can Ask Me About Your Computer (That'll be $100). Tired of people asking you to fix their computer for free? Here's one way to let them know exactly what it will cost . . . just to talk.

Thousand Websites

Thousand Websites
A Journey Of A Thousand Sites Begins With A Single Click. The Confucian saying updated to the 21st century.

W*rk is a 4-Letter Word

W*rk is a 4-Letter Word
W*rk is a Four Letter Word. And why is it that everyone seems to be okay with using four-letter words in public and mixed company?

I'll Email You

I'll Email You
Just telling everyone in advance how you intend to do things.

If I Ever Become A Sidekick.

If I Ever Become A Sidekick.
The Top 10 Things I'd Do If I Ever Become A Sidekick. Tired of the stupid things the sidekick always does? Keep this list handy!

Living Through Denial

Living Through Denial
Better Living Through Denial. The world is a complicated place. Here's one way to keep your view of life simple.

But I'm the IT Tech

But I'm the IT Tech
Jesus Loves You, But I'm the IT Tech So You Better Run For Your Life. Hey, what more can you say in the way of a warning?

EBKAC error (Error Between Keyboard and Chair)

EBKAC error (Error Between Keyboard and Chair)
Sometimes the problem is not with the computer software, or even the computer hardware. The problem lies elsewhere.

Hasta La Vista, Vista!

Hasta La Vista, Vista!
Hasta La Vista, Vista! Say goodbye to this buggy, virus prone monster, and say hello to something better.

I'm Not A Fast Programmer

I'm Not A Fast Programmer
You're a programmer. One the proud. One of the few. One of the average.

I.T. Is Not Just A Job...

I.T. Is Not Just A Job...
I.T. Is Not Just A Job, I.T.'s A Way of Life. When you're the computer expert at the company, everyone expects you to solve their computer problems. Even the people who don't work for the company.

If I Ever Become An Evil Overlord!

If I Ever Become An Evil Overlord!
The Top 10 Things I'd Do If I Ever Become An Evil Overlord. Tired of the stupid things the villian always does? Keep this list handy!

If I Ever Become A Hero.

If I Ever Become A Hero.
The Top 10 Things I'd Do If I Ever Become A Hero. Tired of the stupid things the hero always does? Keep this list handy!

If I'm Ever The Innocent Bystander.

If I'm Ever The Innocent Bystander.
The Top 10 Things I'd Do If I'm Ever The Innocent Bystander. Tired of the stupid things the bystander always does? Keep this list handy!

If I Ever Become The Hero's True Love.

If I Ever Become The Hero's True Love.
The Top 10 Things I'd Do If I Ever Become The Hero's True Love. Tired of the stupid things the heroine always does? Keep this list handy!

If Ignorance/Windows

If Ignorance/Windows
Ignorance is Bliss. No Wonder So Many People Are Happy With Windows. Computer users, for the most part, use the tools they are given, without questioning how good those tools are. So it is with OSes.

When in doubt, right-click!

When in doubt, right-click!
Remind people on a daily basis that the right-click button can be a life-saver. Or, at least, save a call to the helpdesk.

Let Me Drop Everything...

Let Me Drop Everything...
Let Me Drop Everything And Work On Your Problem. Some people think the world revolves around them. They expect you to ask "how high" when they say "jump." For the smarter ones, maybe this will help.

We are the Techs who say...

We are the Techs who say...
Another takeoff on Monty Python. What else can I say?

Why the Idiots Win...

Why the Idiots Win...
Why the Idiots Will Always Win: Genius Has It's Limits, Stupidity, None. This is so true it should be engraved in the mind of anyone who designs, builds, or maintains anything!

Fish/Net

Fish/Net
Give A Man A Fish And You Feed Him For A Day, Teach Him To Use The Net And He Won't Bother You For Weeks. A unique perspective on the old saw about teaching a man to fish to make him self-sufficient.

I haven't Lost My Mind (FD)

I haven't Lost My Mind (FD)
I Haven't Lost My Mind, It's Backed Up On A Flashdrive Somewhere. Making backups of your personal data is always important, if you could only remember where you put the backup...

Not Fix Your Computer

Not Fix Your Computer
No, I Will Not Fix Your Computer. Once people discover you're computer savvy, they start asking you for help with their computer.

Clean House/Fix Computer

Clean House/Fix Computer
I Will Fix Your Computer If You Clean My House. Tired of people asking you to fix their computer for free? Here's one way to let them know you expect a payment of some kind.

I haven't Lost My Mind (tape)

I haven't Lost My Mind (tape)
Making backups of your personal data is always important, if you could only remember where you put the backup...

If Ignorance is Bliss...

If Ignorance is Bliss...
If Ignorance is Bliss, Why Haven't You Attained Nirvana? Some people seem to avoid learning as diligently as any religious devotee tries for perfection.

Clean Condo/Fix Computer

Clean Condo/Fix Computer
I Will Fix Your Computer If You Clean My Condo. Tired of people asking you to fix their computer for free? Here's one way to let them know you expect a payment of some kind.

I haven't Lost My Mind (disk)

I haven't Lost My Mind (disk)
Making backups of your personal data is always important, if you could only remember where you put the backup...

Patience, Dude, Patience.

Patience, Dude, Patience.
Patience, Dude, Patience. Some people just need to slow down. Tell them so.

Clean Apartment/Fix Computer

Clean Apartment/Fix Computer
I Will Fix Your Computer If You Clean My Apartment. Tired of people asking you to fix their computer for free? Here's one way to let them know you expect a payment of some kind.

Lan Security/Tester

Lan Security/Tester
An office network is only as good as its defenses.

When You Have A Problem...

When You Have A Problem...
When You Have A Problem, Shut-up, Sit Down, and Find a Workaround, Some people just don't understand that it is up to them to solve their problems, not you.

Deadlines Amuse Me

Deadlines Amuse Me
Deadlines Amuse Me. The bane of everyone who has to deal with them, tell people your opinion of deadlines.

If Ignorance is Bliss (users)

If Ignorance is Bliss (users)
You work and work, but for some reason the users of the network you manage never seem to be satisfied.

Never Let A Computer...

Never Let A Computer...
Never let a computer know you're in a hurry. If you do, something always seems to go wrong.

Freelancers Unite! Say 10-ish at the Coffee House?

Freelancers Unite! Say 10-ish at the Coffee House?
Freelancers Unite! Say 10-ish at the Coffee House? Freelance workers have a difficult job. Work is always uncertain, benefits are meager, & peer support almost unknown. Perhaps they should organize.

IT Consultants Tell...

IT Consultants Tell...
It's their job to tell others what to do and how to do it.

Just Reinstall The O.S.

Just Reinstall The O.S.
Just Reinstall The O.S. Sometimes the best thing to do is to start all over and erase your (or their) mistakes.

ID 10 T Error

ID 10 T Error
You have an ID 10 T error. Unfortunately, this is an all too common problem that crosses to every computer platform.

Trivia Geek

Trivia Geek
Tell the world about your obsession.

Working for the Geekend

Working for the Geekend
Hey, it's what the techies and geeks work for . . .

Internet Police

Internet Police
Keep the rest in line by keeping them on their toes. Tell 'um your job description.

Network Security

Network Security
Network Security (I Read Your Email!) Keep your users on their toes. Or at least off their keyboards for those personal messages.

New Mouse/Old Clicks

New Mouse/Old Clicks
Getting used to a new mouse is always a learning experience, especially the fancy ones with features that make it easier to navigate.

New Mouse/Old Clicks Cheese

New Mouse/Old Clicks Cheese
Getting used to a new mouse is always a learning experience, especially the fancy ones with features that make it easier to navigate.

No Place Like Home (text)

No Place Like Home (text)
There's No Place Like 127.0.0.1 (text). A unique, geekish way of saying "there's no place like home."

Nothing's Foolproof

Nothing's Foolproof
No matter how hard you try, or how carefully you plan, the fools, always seem to win.

IERR, therefore I am

IERR, therefore I am
Computer philosophy (with apologies to Descartes).

If The Computer Isn't Listening...

If The Computer Isn't Listening...
For a hunk of hardware without any real awareness of its surroundings, it's scary how often this type of tactic gets results.

No Place Like Home (dots)

No Place Like Home (dots)
There's No Place Like 127.0.0.1 (dots). A unique, geekish way of saying "there's no place like home."

Home-cooked Meal

Home-cooked Meal
Tell people exactly what you charge for your technical services. You expect a home-cooked meal for fixing their computer!

Reboot or Re-dock

Reboot or Re-dock
Some computer problems have easy fixes. Or at least, you can recover from a problem by starting all over.

Switch It Off/On.

Switch It Off/On.
Have You Tried Switching It OFF And ON Again? Computers and software are so complicated that sometimes the only solution is to shut it down.

Firefoxy (text)

Firefoxy (text)
Support your favorite browser.

If Your Request Was Important...

If Your Request Was Important...
Let the others in your company know how they rank in your list of priorities.

Spool Cheeker

Spool Cheeker
An in-joke for computer user's: I need a spool cheeker.

10 Kinds of People

10 Kinds of People
The world as seen by techies: There are only 10 kinds of people in the world. Those who know binary and those who don't.

DOS is Boss

DOS is Boss
Set those Windows and Macintosh nitwits straight. The only true operating system is DOS.

Vista Resista!

Vista Resista!
Tell the world your opinion of Microsoft's latest offering.

If You Call Me For Help...

If You Call Me For Help...
That's the problem with people who call you for help, they're just full of advice on how to fix a problem on equipment they know nothing about. (Most apparel is printed on both sides)

Using Windows

Using Windows
Windows' users are fun to watch, and you can always tell who's a Windows' user.

Computers Work 4 Me

Computers Work 4 Me
Some users just don't get it. They seem to think that computers are there to tell them what to do. Set them straight.

Not My Department

Not My Department
God knows why, but you sure don't. Why do people insist on asking you to do things that properly are the responsibility of other departments? Set them straight, right off.

Errors Have Been Made.

Errors Have Been Made.
e proper course of action in any organization: Cover Your Ass.

Set Printer to Kill

Set Printer to Kill
Don't you sometimes wish you could?

 Information: If In Doubt, Don't Give It Out

Information: If In Doubt, Don't Give It Out
The hardest lesseon to teach to any user, as every company I.T. manager can attest

Game Players

Game Players
You know how it is, once you get started on a "game" you just can't bring yourself to stop!

If Idiots Grew on Trees...

If Idiots Grew on Trees...
Unfortunately, most workplaces make this an all too-true statement.

Software Developers

Software Developers
You know how it is, once you get started the time just flies by and before you know it, it's daybreak!

Militant Pinguinista

Militant Pinguinista
Proudly show your support for the operating system that puts all others to shame.

Website Operators

Website Operators
Well, it is their job to make sure the "equipment" and "software" are always ready and available for any request!

Piss-Poor Planning = Problems

Piss-Poor Planning = Problems
There's not much more you can say than this about any project a business or group might try to finish.

That's Odd

That's Odd
That's Odd, It Works On My Computer. What more can you say to someone complaining about a piece of software that seems to be just fine on everyone else's computer?

Computers Drive Mad

Computers Drive Mad
Those Whom Computers Would Destroy, They First Drive Mad. It certainly seems that way doesn't it?

No Software Survives

No Software Survives
No matter how well you plan, no matter how many flowcharts you make, no matter how many users you talk to, and no matter how carefully you write the code, the software always has problems when someone

Chess/kickboxing

Chess/kickboxing
Tired of the computer always winning? Just pick a subject you know your computer will lose all the time.

Font You!

Font You!
Put them down while telling them what you do best!

Save often, Save Now!

Save often, Save Now!
The best possible advice you can give.

HTML tits begin/end

HTML tits begin/end
Ladies, separate the Brains from the Brawn with this helpful HTML code on where they start and where they stop!

HTML Stop Staring

HTML Stop Staring
Ladies, separate the Brains from the Brawn with this techy way to say "stop staring."


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