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» Maternity, Kids, Family
   » My Favorite People Call Me...
      » Favorite People Call Me Mimi
      » My Favorite People Call Me Bompy
   » 2012 To-Be
      » Dad-to-Be 2012
      » Great Grandma-to-Be 2012
      » Nana-to-Be 2012
      » Grandparents-to-be 2012
      » Brother-to-Be 2010
      » Sister-to-Be 2010
      » Uncle-to-Be 2010
      » Mom-to-Be 2010
      » Grandpa-to-Be 2010
      » Grandma-to-Be 2010
      » Aunt-to-Be 2012
   » Dingo Snack
   » Knocked Up
   » I Put Out
   » Soon-to-Be Dad
   » Baby Daddy To Be
   » Baby Mama To Be
   » Big Brother
   » Big Sister
   » Bald Chicks Rock
   » Daddy's Little Girl
   » MILF
   » Baby Gaga
   » I Heart My ____
      » You Heart Me
      » I Heart My Daughter
      » I Heart My Son
      » I Heart My Husband
      » I Heart My Wife
      » I Heart My Aunt
      » I Heart My Brother
      » I Heart My Cousin
      » I Heart My Daddy
      » I Heart My Grandma
      » I Heart My Great Grandma
      » I Heart My Grandpa
      » I Heart My Great Grandpa
      » I Heart My Mommy
      » I Heart My Sister
      » I Heart My Uncle
   » It's a Girl!
   » It's a Boy!
   » We're Pregnant!
   » No no NO! SHE Eats for Two!
   » DILF
   » MYLF
   » Mom Rules
   » Bump (and Arrow)
   » Bun + Oven
   » Pirate Baby
   » I'm Not A Girl
   » I'm Not A Boy
   » Bald Chicks Rule
   » Princess
   » Spoiled
   » Too Cute to Work
   » Male Symbol
   » Female Symbol
   » Warning: New Dad
   » Warning: New Mom
   » Newbie Dad
   » Newbie Mom
   » New Dad
   » New Mom
   » Pregnancy - Personal Space
   » Just Because I'm Pregnant...
   » Items for the New Parents
      » 2008: Mommy's First Mother's Day
      » New Mom
      » Newbie Mom
      » New Dad
      » Newbie Dad
   » Nope. Just Fat
   » About My Pregnancy Fill-In Form
   » Please Don't Touch the Merchandise
   » Don't Know? Don't Touch!
   » Touch My Tummy I Get to Stab You
   » Touch My Belly I Get to Stab You
   » If You Touch Me I Stab You
   » Mom-to-Be
   » Girls Have Cooties
   » Boys Have Cooties
   » World's Greatest Dad
   » World's Greatest Stepdad...
   » World's Greatest Grandpa...
   » Dad, You'll Never Know...
   » Cause I Said So
   » Cause I'm the Dad
   » Turn This Car Around
   » I Grill Therefore I Am...
» Health and Cancer-related Products
   » Cancer Sayings
      » Cancer Sucks
      » I Support My _____
         » I Support My Aunt
         » I Support My Best Friend
         » I Support My Boobs
         » I Support My Cousin
         » I Support My Daughter
         » I Support My Daughter-in-Law
         » I Support My Friend
         » I Support My Girlfriend
         » I Support My Grandmother
         » I Support Great Grandma
         » I Support My Mom
         » I Support My Mother-in-Law
         » I Support My Nana
         » I Support My Sister
         » I Support My Sister-in-Law
         » I Support My Stepmother
         » I Support My Tits
         » I Support My Wife
      » Fuck Cancer
      » F*ck Cancer
      » Bald Chicks Rock
      » Bald Chicks Rule
      » MY Oncologist Can Beat Up YOUR Oncologist
      » Cancer Sucks
      » One more MRI...Stick to the Fridge
      » My Sister Jackie
      » I Kill Tumors
      » Cancer Bites
      » I Have Cancer It Does Not Have Me
      » Cancer: Control, Accept...
      » Ask Me About Courage
      » it IS a tumor
      » Cancer - Lousy T-Shirt
      » Say No to Cancer
      » Cancer Poem
      » I Have Cancer Not Cooties
      » Smile...Remission
      » Team Scrubs for Jugs
      » My Sister Vicky
         » Support Circle Text
      » If I Were A Dog I'd Have Been Put to Sleep
      » What's YOUR excuse?
      » Cancer Free
      » Cancer Survivor
      » Any More Radiation and I'll Glow in the Dark
      » Any More Chemo I'll Glow in the Dark
      » Bald = Beautiful_CA
      » Cancer Definition
      » Cancer Isn't Contagious
      » I Fought Cancer...and Won
      » Cancer Isn't Contagious..Laughter Is
      » Cancer Not Who I Am
      » Cancer Sucks (Script)
      » Cancer Bites
      » Chemo Bites
      » Chemo It's What's For Dinner
      » Cancer Can Be Beaten
   » I Don't Have A.D.D. - Shiny
   » I Just Quit Smoking Products
      » New Ex-Smoker
      » Just Quit Smoking_Cig
      » I Just Quit Smoking
      » Quit Smoking - Mouth
      » Kiss Me I Just Quit Smoking_Lips
      » Kiss Me I Just Quit Smoking
   » Fibromyalgia Products
      » Sick - Dumb
      » Today's Flare
      » Fibromyalgia Sucks
      » Fibro Sucks
      » FM Sucks
      » Having Bad Flare Day
» Pop Culture
   » CP Design Contest
   » My Pimp Hand is Strong
   » ISH
   » I Drink Your Milkshake!
   » YMMV
   » I'm Goin' for Actressing
   » EVS
   » Visit South Carolina..Such As
   » Don't TASE Me, Bro!
   » Ding Fries Are Done!
      » Ding Fries - Black Font
      » Don't Bob for Fries in Hot Fat
   » STFU
   » WTF
   » Duh!
   » You're Being Glib, Matt
   » Naomi Hit Me Too
   » You Are HERE
   » EVS - Australian Whatever
   » what...EVER
   » Exclamation Point
   » Question Mark
   » Boo Got Shot!
   » Just Damn
   » Memory Full
   » System Overload
   » Skull Trash
   » Car Smoke Skull
   » Argh!
   » Arrrgh.
   » Skull Red Banner
   » Purple Skull Heart
   » Dancing Skeleton
   » Geometric Skull in Circle
   » Skull Wheel
   » Skeleton on Clothesline
   » Skull with Earth Pattern
   » Skull & Crossbones Red Circle
   » Skulls on Yellow Background
   » Skull & Swords
   » Skull Red Banner
   » Free Paris
   » Skull & Crossbones 1
   » Angry Skull & Crossbones
   » Series Finale Opinions
      » Boycott Chase
      » Fuhgeddabout Chase
      » Wish my Cable
      » Don't Talk to Me - Mad
      » Don't Talk to Me - Happy
      » HBNooo
      » Team Brilliant Finale
      » Team Crappy Lazy Finale
      » Team Screw You
      » Team Shuddup
      » Team Suck It
      » Fuck Chase
      » Fuck You Chase
      » Screw You Chase
      » Chase Can Suck It
» Humor
   » I Don't Have A.D.D. - Shiny
   » Few Clowns Short of a Circus
   » I Heart to Fart
   » Gnomies are my Homies
   » I'd Pee on Your Jellyfish Sting
   » If I Were A Dog...Put to Sleep
   » Rosie the Riveter's Pimp Hand
   » I Hate People
   » Sofa King
   » Peace Love Coffee
   » Your OCD..My OCD
   » You Say Bitch Like It's A Bad Thing
   » EVS
   » I Don't Have OCD
   » Ding Fries Are Done!
      » Don't Fuck with Fries in Hot Fat
      » Don't Bob for Fries [R]
      » Don't Bob for Fries [Hurts Bad]
      » Don't Bob for Fries in Hot Fat
      » Ding Fries Are Done
   » Too Cute to Work
   » Too Bad Ignorance Isn't Painful
   » Unique Like Everyone Else
   » Your Proctologist Called
   » Instant Gratification Takes Too Long
   » Kind of a Big Deal
   » Kosher
   » Not Kosher
   » I Hate Everybody & You're Next
   » If It's Not One Thing It's Your Mother
   » Too Bad Ignorance Isn't Painful Items
   » Visit South Carolina..Such As
   » This Space For Rent
   » I'm Not Stubborn, My Way is Just Better
   » No. You're Ugly.
   » Who Hurt You Baby?
   » You're Just Jealous
   » Hang Up & Drive
   » Men Are Dumb
   » Dork
   » Doofus
   » Sedated
   » You Suck
   » Not Okay
   » I'm A Warrior [Green]
   » I'm A Warrior [Yellow]
   » I Don't Do Recreational Drugs
   » Puttin' the FUN in dysfunctional
   » Badonkalicious
   » Have You Been Sniffing Dumb Dust?
   » Freak of Nature
   » You're Being Glib
   » Bald = Beautiful
   » Boys Have Cooties
   » Girls Have Cooties
   » Ya Think?!
   » Not MY Fault You Suck
   » It's Not MY Fault You're Stupid
   » I'm So Old I Fart Dust
   » Today's Your Day in the Barrel
   » Admitting You're An Asshole is the First Step
   » Bumper Stickers
» Political
   » Know More Democrats Know More Republicans
   » Imagine Peace
   » My Carbon Footprint
   » Speak English Products
      » No Hablo Espanol_RC
      » No Hablo Espanol
      » When in America
      » Proud to be American
      » Speak English Faded
      » Speak English
   » Free Speech
      » Where's the Intelligence
      » End Celebrity Stupidity
      » My Response is ALSO Free Speech
      » Define Free Speech
      » Free Speech Means Me Too
      » Free Speech - Not Just for Celebrities Anymore
   » Jesus Saves...But...
   » No IRS
» Products for Strong, Fierce, & Funny Females
   » Princess
   » Badonkalicious
   » Cramps Suck
   » Leave Me Alone I Have Cramps
   » I Hate Cramps
   » Broadzilla
   » You Say Bitch Like it's a Bad Thing
   » Mean Grrl
   » I Am Not Your Bitch
   » Boys Have Cooties
   » Boys are Dumb
   » Spoiled
   » Princess (curly font)
   » Guys Have Feelings Too...
   » Just Say No to Housework
   » One Nerve Left - You Are Pluckin' It
   » Still Miss My Ex...Aim is Improving
   » Diva Products
      » Diva Bumperstickers
      » Diva
      » Diva
      » Diva
   » Princess
   » Angel Shhh
   » I'm Busy. You're Ugly. Have a Nice Day.
   » Serenity...to hide the bodies
   » Easy There Mr. Testosterone
   » Hard-on not Personal Growth
» Funny Holiday Products
   » Funny Christmas & Holiday Products
      » Ding Fries Are Done!
      » Ho Frickin' Ho
      » Shalom Bitches!
      » Christmas Ho
      » Santa Missed Christmas
      » Go Jesus! It's Yer Birthday!
      » Smiley Emoticon - Santa Hat
      » Frown Emoticon - Santa Hat
      » Oh! Emoticon with Santa Hat
      » Kiss Emoticon - Mistletoe
      » Wink Emoticon - Mistletoe
      » Frown Emoticon - Christmas Coal
      » Merry Freakin' Christmas
      » Merry Fuckin' Christmas
      » Merry Freakin' Ho Ho!
      » Merry Fuckin' Ho Ho!
      » Merry Freakin' Xmas
      » Merry Fuckin' Xmas
      » And That's Why John & Nancy Divorced
      » Got Balls?
      » And That's Why Santa Doesn't Love You
      » Chappy Chanukah
      » Personalized Ornaments
      » Baby's First Christmas 2008
      » Baby's First Chanukah 2008
      » Our First Chanukah 2008
      » Our First Christmas 2008
      » Santa I Was FRAMED!
      » Season's Greetings
      » Santa Flakes
      » 'Tis the Season
      » Season's Greetings (Holly)
      » O Joy! (Tangled Man in Christmas Lights)
      » Happy Holidays Gingerbread Man
      » Dear Santa, Fuck Off
      » Our First Chanukah 2007
      » Baby's First Christmas 2007
      » Baby's First Chanukah 2007
      » Our First Christmas 2007
   » Valentine's Day
      » You Heart Me
      » Funny Candy Heart Sayings
         » Question Mark Candy Heart
         » Curse Word Symbols on a Candy Heart
         » Peace Symbol Candy Heart
         » Gay Candy Heart - 2 "Female" Symbols
         » Gay Candy Heart - 2 "Male" Symbols
         » Stoopid Candy Heart
         » Fuck Off Candy Heart
         » Dollar Sign on a Candy Heart
         » Biohazard Candy Heart
         » Recycle Candy Heart
         » Insert Quote Here
      » I Heart My _____
         » I Heart My Wife
         » I Heart My Husband
         » I Heart My Mommy
         » I Heart My Daddy
         » I Heart My Daughter
         » I Heart My Son
         » I Heart My Sister
         » I Heart My Brother
         » I Heart My Aunt
         » I Heart My Uncle
         » I Heart My Cousin
         » I Heart My Grandma
         » I Heart My Grandpa
         » I Heart My Great Grandma
         » I Heart My Great Grandpa
   » Anti-Valentine's Day
      » Funny Candy Heart Sayings
         » Question Mark on a Candy Heart
         » Curse Word Symbols on a Candy Heart
         » Peace Symbol on a Candy Heart
         » Dollar Symbol on a Candy Heart
         » Candy Heart Stoopid
         » Fuck Off Candy Heart
         » Biohazard Candy Heart
         » Candy Heart Recycle
         » Insert Quote Here
         » Gay Candy Heart - 2 "Female" Symbols
         » Gay Candy Heart - 2 "Male" Symbols
      » Fuck Valentines Day
      » Fuck Valentine's Day
      » Fuck Cupid
      » Love Sucks
      » Cupid Can Kiss My Ass
      » Cause I'm Dead Inside
      » You Can't Afford Me
      » Screw Love
      » Just Shut Up & Do Me
      » Just Do Me
      » Missing: Sensitivity Chip
      » Missing Sensitivity Chip_NP
      » Not Yours
      » Be Someone Else's
      » Stalker Humor
         » Stalker
         » Get Back In Your Cage!
         » Stalking You Is Going to be So Much Fun
         » I Can't Wait To Stalk You
         » Hello My Name Is: Your Stalker
      » No. You're Ugly.
      » How Can I Miss You..Go Away
   » St. Patrick's Day
      » Kiss Me I'm Irish Mexican!
   » Mother's Day
      » Mom Rules
      » World's Greatest
         » World's Greatest Aunt
         » World's Greatest Cousin
         » World's Greatest Daughter
         » World's Greatest Daughter-in-Law
         » World's Greatest Friend
         » World's Greatest Girlfriend
         » World's Greatest Grandma
         » World's Greatest Great Grandma
         » World's Greatest Mom
         » World's Greatest Mother-in-Law
         » World's Greatest Nana
         » World's Greatest Sister
         » World's Greatest Sister-in-Law
         » World's Greatest Stepmom
         » World's Greatest Wife
      » I Heart My Mommy
      » I Heart My Grandma
      » I Heart My Sister
      » I Heart My Aunt
   » Father's Day
      » DILF
      » Because I Said So!
      » Soon-to-Be Dad
      » No, No, No! SHE Eats for Two!
      » World's Greatest Dad
      » World's Greatest Stepdad
      » World's Greatest Grandpa
      » Vintage Dad
      » I Grill Therefore I Am
      » Cause I Said So
      » Cause I'm the Dad that's Why
      » Want Me to Turn this Car Around?
      » Dad You'll Never Know...
      » I Heart My Daddy
      » I Heart My Grandpa
      » I Heart My Brother
      » I Heart My Uncle
      » Kick Ass Dad
      » Vintage Dad - Crackled
      » Gee Dad Swell
      » Hello My Name is World's Greatest Dad
      » World's Best Dad
      » Dad Heart
» Art / Photo
   » Pampas Grass and Sky
   » Pampas Grass Photo Burned Edge
» Custom Products for You!
   » Custom Holiday Designs
   » Gracie's New BFF
   » Agile Team 2008
   » Customized Calendars
   » Final Touch Building Services
   » O'Brien Orthopedics
   » Custom - My [Sister] Vicky is a Survivor
   » Custom - I Support Vicky
   » Custom - Rick's Place
   » Nate's Customized Products
» Funny Adult Humor
   » Homophobia = Gay
   » Bitch
   » Ho
   » slamhog
   » slut
   » whore
   » Beanabitch
   » Quit Beanabitch
   » Shudduhfukup
   » Fuck
   » F*ck
   » F*ck Off
   » Fuck Off - Faded
   » Fuck Off - Backward
   » Fuck You You Fucking Fuck
   » Fuck You You Fucking Fuck_98
» Military & 9/11 Support
   » War Posters
      » Keep Mum Chum War Poster
      » Keep it to Yourself Buddy
      » Air Raid War Poster
   » Support Our Troops
      » Dog Tags - Support Our Troops
         » Support Troops Dog Tags
      » Support Our Troops (w/Yellow Ribbon)
      » I Support My Dad
      » I Support My Daddy
      » I Support My Mom
      » I Support My Mommy
      » I Support My Son
      » I Support My Daughter
      » I Support My Husband
      » I Support My Wife
      » I Support My Brother
      » I Support My Sister
      » I Support My Aunt
      » I Support My Uncle
      » I Support My Grandfather
      » I Support My Grandmother
      » I Support My Grandson
      » I Support My Granddaughter
      » I Support My Nephew
      » I Support My Niece
      » I Support My Cousin
      » I Support My Fiance
      » I Support My Boyfriend
      » I Support My Girlfriend
   » WTC Skyline Sketch
   » 9/11 Remember
   » 9/11 Liberty
   » 9/11 We Will Never Forget
   » WTC Never Forget
» Relationship Humor
   » No. You're Ugly
   » Love Sucks
   » Not Yours...
   » Cause I'm Dead Inside
   » You Can't Afford Me
   » Screw Love
   » How Can I Miss You...
   » Just Shut Up & Do Me
   » Just Do Me
   » Missing Sensitivity Chip
   » Missing: Sensitivity Chip..Call
   » Be Someone Else's
   » Stalker Humor
      » Stalker
      » Get Back in Your Cage
      » Stalking You...So Much Fun
      » Hello My Name Is...Your Stalker
      » I Can't Wait to Stalk You
» Sports
   » Get Back In Your Cage
   » Hockey Chick
» Wedding
   » Wedding Bouquet
   » Broadzilla
   » Newlywed
   » Bride (Shiny Gold Text)
   » Sexy Bride
   » Bride to Be


 
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These days, everyone wears their feelings on their sleeves (or pockets...hats...cups) and we have lots of sarcastic, hilarious products to help you do the same!

Want something and can't find it anywhere? Let us make it for you! Send customization requests to princesspumpkinpants@gmail.com and we'll take care of you ASAP!

I Don't Have A.D.D. - Shiny

I Don't Have A.D.D. - Shiny
Easily distracted? Go from room to room, & several hours later you're at the mall instead of the kitchen getting a drink like you planned? Me too! I made the "I Don't Have ADD--Shiny!" products for me

Few Clowns Short of a Circus

Few Clowns Short of a Circus
So many people couldn't find their way out of a paper bag with a map; who lack even basic common sense, and probably won't know you're insulting them with "A Few Clowns Short of a Circus Aren't We?" p

I Heart to Fart

I Heart to Fart
Who doesn't have a son, husband, brother, or...someone in their lives who's just so crass and oh-so-proud of their bodily functions? I Heart to Fart products are just for them!

Gnomies are my Homies

Gnomies are my Homies
Who doesn't love garden gnomes? Isn't it about time we stop hiding them & bring them into the fold? Love your gnomes, people! Shout it loud & proud that Gnomies are my Homies!

I'd Pee on Your Jellyfish Sting

I'd Pee on Your Jellyfish Sting
You have to REALLY love someone and be REALLY committed to getting a laugh by proudly displaying your love (and humor) with "I Love You So Much…I'd Pee on Your Jellyfish Sting!" products!

If I Were A Dog...Put to Sleep

If I Were A Dog...Put to Sleep
If I Were A Dog, I'd Have Been Put To Sleep By Now! products are a great way to smile through the rain, the pain, the not so fun times without dealing in pity.

Rosie the Riveter's Pimp Hand

Rosie the Riveter's Pimp Hand
Ever REALLY looked at Rosie the Riveter's arms?? They're GINORMOUS! So she should say more masculine things, like "My Pimp Hand is Strong!" ...it's rude; it's wrong. It's called parody. Enjoy!

I Hate People

I Hate People
Sometimes the brutal truth is the best way to get your point across. I Hate People products are about as truthful as you can get! Perhaps someone will take a hint (for once)!

Sofa King

Sofa King
"I Am Sofa King We Todd Did" is actually pretty funny. Get people to read it, exactly as written, OUT LOUD. It's hilarious listening to people sound it out when they have NO idea what they’re saying.

Peace Love Coffee

Peace Love Coffee
What more is there to say? It's what we all want: Peace Love Coffee!

Your OCD..My OCD

Your OCD..My OCD
We usually revel in our OCD routines. It's when another OCD'er gets in the WAY of said routines that we REALLY go nuts! Get 'em out of the way with "Your OCD is Infringing on my OCD" products.

You Say Bitch Like It's A Bad Thing

You Say Bitch Like It's A Bad Thing
Since when is strength, confidence, and drive a BAD thing? Shouldn't be, yet such women have been given the label "Bitch" for eons. Turn the meaning around with a "You Say Bitch Like it's a BAD Thing"

EVS

EVS
Why be just average when you want to say "WhatEVER" when you can raise it to another level, saying it the Aussie way with one of our "EVS" products!

I Don't Have OCD

I Don't Have OCD
Part of the madness of OCD is endless counting (usually in patterns or multiples). Also we love to deny we even HAVE it, which makes "I Don't Have OCD" ...five times, irony at its finest.

Ding Fries Are Done!

Ding Fries Are Done!
Any recipient will be thrilled with our popular Ding Fries Are Done products, especially during the holidays! View the hilarious, pop-culture classic at americanangst.com/dingfries.html.

Too Cute to Work

Too Cute to Work
You know deep down you believe that you're "Too Cute to Work" so why not admit to the world? Honesty just makes things easier. Especially when you're on your way to bigger and better things!

Too Bad Ignorance Isn't Painful

Too Bad Ignorance Isn't Painful
We see profound idiots everywhere and wonder if it HURTS being that dumb. That's why "Too Bad Ignorance Isn't Painful!" products are so delicious. If dumb doesn't hurt, at least we have snarky humor!

Unique Like Everyone Else

Unique Like Everyone Else
So many think they're oh-so-special, working overtime to keep from admitting a scary truth: that they just might be spectacularly average. Clue 'em in with "Unique...Just Like Everyone Else" products.

Your Proctologist Called

Your Proctologist Called
It's disappointing how many people have their heads planted firmly up their rear ends, isn't it? Give them a push in the right direction with a "Your proctologist called. He found your head!" product.

Instant Gratification Takes Too Long

Instant Gratification Takes Too Long
Is "impulsive" your middle name? Do you tap your foot and huff impatiently at the microwave because it just takes too long to finish? Then Instant Gratification Takes Too Long products are for YOU!

Kind of a Big Deal

Kind of a Big Deal
Shouldn't EVERYONE be aware of your upper echelon status? Join me in schooling the world with a "Kind of a Big Deal" product!

Kosher

Kosher
Are you kosher? Are you cool? Have you been deemed so by one and all? Wear it proud with a Kosher product! (Which, of course, are not actually kosher.)

Not Kosher

Not Kosher
Perhaps you aren’t kosher yourself and are proud of it (you should be!) or you want to let someone else know that THEY aren’t kosher…we have many products with which to make your feelings known!

I Hate Everybody & You're Next

If It's Not One Thing It's Your Mother

If It's Not One Thing It's Your Mother
Some people have issues with overly controlling, highly critical mothers, for whom NOTHING is good enough. Those are the people who requested "If It's Not One Thing, It's Your Mother" products.

Too Bad Ignorance Isn't Painful Items

Visit South Carolina..Such As

Visit South Carolina..Such As
People can't find the US on a map because, well, some people don't HAVE maps. Sound off against ignorance with a "Visit South Carolina. Take a left at The Iraq then straight on to Such As" product.

This Space For Rent

I'm Not Stubborn, My Way is Just Better

I'm Not Stubborn, My Way is Just Better
Everyone ought to know the truth...that you = genius. For those minions who are either confused or not "In the Know," make it clear: "I'm Not Stubborn, My Way is Just Better."

No. You're Ugly.

No. You're Ugly.
Is there really any reason to beat around the bush? Isn't it time we stop trying to be delicate with everyone's feelings? Enough is enough. Tell 'em before they ask with a "No. You're Ugly" product.

Who Hurt You Baby?

Who Hurt You Baby?
In the seventies, come-on lines involved signs and stars. Thankfully, it's evolved (devolved?) into faux emotion. Ask the essential question "Who hurt you baby?" and watch 'em fall at your feet.

You're Just Jealous

You're Just Jealous
You're just jealous is a term that really doesn't need any description, does it? You KNOW they're jealous and wish they were as fabulous as you. Remind them of it. Often.

Hang Up & Drive

Hang Up & Drive
If you're like me, you are sick and tired of seeing people swerving all over the road, nearly killing people, all because they’re on the phone. Let 'em have it with a "Hang Up & Drive" product!

Men Are Dumb

Men Are Dumb
You know it's true. THEY know it's true. Sometimes your friend is crying about the truth of it...sometimes YOU are. Regardless, Men Are Dumb and we shouldn't be afraid to announce it.

Dork

Dork
Whether it's for you or someone you love (or hate!), a Dork product is the perfect addition to any collection where the owner leads the charge in self-deprecating humor!

Doofus

Doofus
These days we celebrate our flaws and the ability to laugh at ourselves. Lead the charge with a Doofus product.

Sedated

Sedated
Sedated just about covers it. Probably not what The Ramones meant when they wanted it so badly in the seventies, but it certainly applies to "some people" in the here n' now, don'tcha think?

You Suck

Not Okay

Not Okay
This is how Paula lets her staff know she is extremely displeased with their service. For instance, when someone forgets to pack her sweatpants for a "Comfortable Trip.” It’s ridiculous…and hilarious!

I'm A Warrior [Green]

I'm A Warrior [Green]
Paula said it best, didn't she? The world can beat you down, but you can handle anything if: you're a warrior. Live the mantra with your own "I'm a warrior" product. Green Text.

I'm A Warrior [Yellow]

I'm A Warrior [Yellow]
Paula said it best, didn't she? The world can beat you down, but you can handle anything if: you're a warrior. Live the mantra with your own "I'm a warrior" product. Yellow Text.

I Don't Do Recreational Drugs

I Don't Do Recreational Drugs
"I don’t do recreational drugs" products pay homage to Paula's misguided notion that by inserting "recreational" in her denials, people will assume she doesn’t do ANY drugs.

Puttin' the FUN in dysfunctional

Puttin' the FUN in dysfunctional
Is your life crazy? The people IN it? Instead of lamenting the tragedy of it all, embrace it! Find the humor in it. Make it funny instead of tragic with a “Puttin’ the FUN in Dysfunctional” product!

Badonkalicious

Badonkalicious
Do you have that junk in your trunk that men love so much? Does your girlfriend or wife need to hear how much you love her stuff? Say it with a Badonkalicious product!

Have You Been Sniffing Dumb Dust?

Freak of Nature

Freak of Nature
(Well aren't YOU just a 'lil...)

You're Being Glib

Bald = Beautiful

Boys Have Cooties

Girls Have Cooties

Ya Think?!

Not MY Fault You Suck

Not MY Fault You Suck
So many whiners, babies, and blamers. So few who take personal responsibility for their own actions and screwups. Intelligent people unite with an "It's Not MY Fault You Suck" product!

It's Not MY Fault You're Stupid

It's Not MY Fault You're Stupid
So many whiners, babies, and blamers. So few who take personal responsibility for their own actions and screwups. Intelligent people unite with an "It's Not MY Fault You're Stupid" product!

I'm So Old I Fart Dust

I'm So Old I Fart Dust
Age humor! "I'm So Old I Fart Dust" products are a perfect gift idea for that special, over-the-hill person.

Today's Your Day in the Barrel

Today's Your Day in the Barrel
Today's Your Day in the Barrel is quite an improper saying and becomes exceptionally clear with a little (dirty) thought. Suffice to say it's useful if you're in need of a bold statement!

Admitting You're An Asshole is the First Step

Admitting You're An Asshole is the First Step
Who cares what they think? Proudly wear your snarky attitude with an Admitting You're an Asshole is the First Step product.

Bumper Stickers

Bumper Stickers
Make your car your own and let people know who you are with any of our dozens of funny bumper stickers.


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