Stitchmonger Designs: T-shirts & Gifts

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» LIKE A BOSS
» I don't always wear a shirt
» If you can't beat them
» Mess with Texas, get the boot
» AWESOME shirt
» NCIS Show Shirts
» WE MOCK YOU
» North Dakota: Not Canada
» TEAM FEAR
» TEAM STUPID
» TEAM EVIL
» Vampire Wannabe
» I AM A MOTHERFUCKER
» Dexter
» 100% Pure BADASS
» Can of Dumb Ass
» It only seems kinky the first time
» I think I could fall madly in bed with you
» What's that, Sweetness?
» What hath God twat?
» JUICE IT!
» SHMEAT!
» I'm Frigo, Kapeesh?
» Berlin College
» RIDES RIDES RIDES
» Paddy's Irish Pub
» FMLA: Fridays and Mondays Leave Act
» I love alien squid
» Weedies
» Dorks Unite
» The Internet: Retards Without Borders
» Triumph = try + umph
» I am Jack's shirt
» Predator posing as a house pet
» One Night Stand
» Recycle your children
» Recycle your animals
» Kittens are Delicious
» Hope is for pussies
» If you can't beat them, kill them in their sleep.
» We voted on it. It was unanimous. You suck.
» I'm killing you in my mind
» Stimulus Package in my pants
» My Stimulus Package
» Meet Goliath
» I am NOT the father
» OBJECTION!
» You wouldn't like me
» Contents are Extremely Sexy
» Never go in against a Sicilian
» My shirt has a meta-joke on it
» O'Malley's
» Can't cure Stupid
» Major League Pimp
» That's What She Said
» I Drink Your Milkshake
» SPEAK FREELY (while you still can)
» Who needs History?
» AMERICA IS #1
» Zombie History
» Zombie Jesus
» I put a roofie in your drink
» Son of a Birch
» Hangovers only happen if you stop drinking
» Spoiler Alert
» How am I not myself?
» 12 System Death Sentence
» Hail Xenu!
» Stay Stupid!
» Your Election Headquarters
» VOTE (while you still can)
» Bush evolved from monkeys
» Diebold's new slogan
» Apocalipstick Now
» You're so money
» Bitch is the new Black
» Go sell crazy somewhere else
» Probably Drunk
» iHot uNot
» Hypnosis Pick Up
» I'M HERE TO STEAL STUFF
» Florida has erectile dysfunction
» 7 Days Without
» DA BOMB!
» Porn Sex Education
» Helvetica Revolution
» I Love to Fuck My Wife
» Oklahoma OK!
» New Jersey: The Dirty Sock State
» BLOWJOB
» I Love Anorexics
» Stop the subject
» I'm not old, I'm experienced
» (No one wants to die)
» DRONE
» Slut: Come & Get It!
» Preggers
» Threesome Humor
» Wheelchair Humor
» Half a nice day
» King of Stupid
» Hardly working
» Abstinence Makes the Heart
» Be cool my babies
» But I'm good at it...
» Ain't Lion
» Crit Happens
» Bush WTF?
» New Section
» What would Kirk do?
» What would Locke do?
» Fun Fuel Gauges
» Bumper Stickers
» OVAL LOVE
» Zombie gotta eat!
» La dee freakin' da
» Dog Eat Shit World
» Gaining scalp
» Spare the Rodham
» ASS!
» Wanna take me home?
» Made in Canada
» Who needs God?
» Man-Whore
» NO PITY FOR THE WEAK
» Jesus got mad skills
» Retail is Hell
» Consume Barcode
» Rules exist to make other people happy
» Shit hits the fan
» Pinch-Free Zone
» Rules Suck
» Radiation Bleed
» Living Proof of Murphy's Law
» Addicted to workahol
» Lost Virginity
» Lesbians against the GOP
» Work Stoned
» Valentine's Day
» Made in China


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Browse Products

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Check out our designs! These designs are available on t-shirts and other apparel, as well as a wide variety of cool gifts. We're always adding more designs and products so check back with us often. Thanks for visiting!

LIKE A BOSS

LIKE A BOSS
Buy this gear and take care of business... LIKE A BOSS!

I don't always wear a shirt

I don't always wear a shirt
The most interesting shirt in the world.

If you can't beat them

If you can't beat them
If you can't beat them, pay someone to do it for you. Occupy Wall Street (OWS) protesters may find this statement especially true. This humorous design is available on t-shirts, mugs and stickers.

Mess with Texas, get the boot

AWESOME shirt

AWESOME shirt
I only wear this shirt when I'm AWESOME. Best. Shirt. Evarrrrrrrrrrrr.

NCIS Show Shirts

NCIS Show Shirts
If you're a big fan of NCIS you'll find a trove of fun designs that look great on shirts, mugs and other products.

WE MOCK YOU

WE MOCK YOU
We mock you when you're not around. And we love doing it. This mean, cruel, insensitive and down right funny design is available on shirts, stickers and mugs.

North Dakota: Not Canada

TEAM FEAR

TEAM FEAR
Lead the charge for Team Fear!

TEAM STUPID

TEAM STUPID
Lead the charge for Team Stupid!

TEAM EVIL

TEAM EVIL
Lead the charge for Team Evil!

Vampire Wannabe

Vampire Wannabe
The fake fangs are a dead giveaway.

I AM A MOTHERFUCKER

I AM A MOTHERFUCKER
Epic Beard Man's shirt says it all: I AM A MOTHERFUCKER

Dexter

100% Pure BADASS

Can of Dumb Ass

It only seems kinky the first time

It only seems kinky the first time
A dirty but hilarious design for those who like the naughty stuff.

I think I could fall madly in bed with you

I think I could fall madly in bed with you
A great pick-up line that makes clear your intentions. Kind of like a sex disclaimer.

What's that, Sweetness?

What's that, Sweetness?
Sweetness is Stephen Colbert's life partner, and a .38 revolver. This Colbert Report inspired design honors the love that exists between a man and his gun.

What hath God twat?

What hath God twat?
What hath God twat? For those who love to tweet, twit, twat, twote or whatever it is you kids are calling it. This humorous design is great for those addicted to twittering, blogging and other high-

JUICE IT!

JUICE IT!
JUICE IT!: The battle cry of Stephen Colbert, now conveniently printed on shirts! Nation, not wearing this patriotic design means you're a filthy commie bastard!

SHMEAT!

SHMEAT!
Shmeat! The meat that's grown in a petri dish and is also the inescapable future of humanity.

I'm Frigo, Kapeesh?

Berlin College

RIDES RIDES RIDES

Paddy's Irish Pub

FMLA: Fridays and Mondays Leave Act

I love alien squid

Weedies

Dorks Unite

Dorks Unite
Dorks of the world, we must unite!

The Internet: Retards Without Borders

Triumph = try + umph

I am Jack's shirt

Predator posing as a house pet

One Night Stand

Recycle your children

Recycle your animals

Kittens are Delicious

Hope is for pussies

If you can't beat them, kill them in their sleep.

We voted on it.  It was unanimous.  You suck.

I'm killing you in my mind

Stimulus Package in my pants

My Stimulus Package

Meet Goliath

I am NOT the father

OBJECTION!

You wouldn't like me

Contents are Extremely Sexy

Contents are Extremely Sexy
WARNING: Contents are Extremely Sexy

Never go in against a Sicilian

My shirt has a meta-joke on it

O'Malley's

Can't cure Stupid

Can't cure Stupid
The worst of the incurable diseases

Major League Pimp

That's What She Said

I Drink Your Milkshake

SPEAK FREELY (while you still can)

Who needs History?

Who needs History?
Its not like repeats itself

AMERICA IS #1

AMERICA IS #1
This design is #1. All others are #2 or lower.

Zombie History

Zombie Jesus

I put a roofie in your drink

Son of a Birch

Hangovers only happen if you stop drinking

Spoiler Alert

How am I not myself?

12 System Death Sentence

Hail Xenu!

Stay Stupid!

Your Election Headquarters

Your Election Headquarters
Republican or Democrat we have your election headquarters and humorous designs. Show your support for your future President of the United States.

VOTE (while you still can)

Bush evolved from monkeys

Diebold's new slogan

Diebold's new slogan
Elections don't fix themselves.

Apocalipstick Now

You're so money

You're so money
And you don't even know it.

Bitch is the new Black

Bitch is the new Black
Being a bitch is so IN.

Go sell crazy somewhere else

Probably Drunk

iHot uNot

Hypnosis Pick Up

I'M HERE TO STEAL STUFF

Florida has erectile dysfunction

Florida has erectile dysfunction
The state of Florida, like many of its residents, suffers from E.D.

7 Days Without

DA BOMB!

Porn Sex Education

Helvetica Revolution

I Love to Fuck My Wife

Oklahoma OK!

New Jersey: The Dirty Sock State

BLOWJOB

BLOWJOB
Have you ever had a blowjob? Or maybe just a job that blows?

I Love Anorexics

Stop the subject

I'm not old, I'm experienced

(No one wants to die)

(No one wants to die)
The conundrum of the afterlife.

DRONE

Slut: Come & Get It!

Preggers

Threesome Humor

Threesome Humor
Are you master of the threeway or are you still trying to live the dream? Can you manage a menage a trois? More threesome t-shirt designs inside.

Wheelchair Humor

Half a nice day

King of Stupid

Hardly working

Abstinence Makes the Heart

Be cool my babies

But I'm good at it...

Ain't Lion

Ain't Lion
Tell 'em you're an honest person who would never lie. You're not a lying liar! You ain't lion!

Crit Happens

Bush WTF?

New Section

What would Kirk do?

What would Kirk do?
Do you run your life by the prime directive? Show your love for classic Trek with one of these t-shirt designs featuring Kirk, Spock, Bones, and Scottie.

What would Locke do?

What would Locke do?
For you LOST fans! Do you ask yourself "What would Locke do in this situation?" We also have designs for other characters with more coming!

Fun Fuel Gauges

Bumper Stickers

Bumper Stickers
Designs meant for your car's backside

OVAL LOVE

OVAL LOVE
This section is devoted to designs created for oval stickers (though they look just fine on other products too!).

Zombie gotta eat!

La dee freakin' da

Dog Eat Shit World

Gaining scalp

Gaining scalp
Who said going bald is a bad thing?

Spare the Rodham

Spare the Rodham
Hillary Clinton may soon be the next president. Are we ready?

ASS!

Wanna take me home?

Made in Canada

Who needs God?

Man-Whore

Man-Whore
Let the ladies know you're not playing hard to get.

NO PITY FOR THE WEAK

Jesus got mad skills

Retail is Hell

Retail is Hell
If you've worked retail you know its HELL.

Consume Barcode

Rules exist to make other people happy

Shit hits the fan

Pinch-Free Zone

Pinch-Free Zone
Don't want to get pinched this St. Patrick's Day? Wear some green with this design that reminds any would-be pinchers that you are off limits!

Rules Suck

Radiation Bleed

Living Proof of Murphy's Law

Addicted to workahol

Lost Virginity

Lesbians against the GOP

Work Stoned

Valentine's Day

Made in China



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