WELCOME!
The place where Those In the Know know to go. Life is a circus, and this is the place to purchase merchandise based on the popular QlownTown.com comic strip and website. ALMOST EVERY QLOWNTOWN COMIC STRIP IS AVAILABLE HERE! (If you saw a QlownTown strip that doesn't appear here, write to dsmith-weiss@qlowntown.com and request that we add it.) This is the perfect time of year to shop QlownTown...give the gift of laughter!

Hip replacement Find other QlownTown merchandise at www.cafepress.com/qlowntown	Snowman trips For more QlownTown stuff, go to www.cafepress.com/qlowntown.	Life is a cabernet Almost any cartoon that has ever appeared at www.qlowntown.com is available here. If you don't see it, email us at dsmith-weiss@qlowntown.com and we'll add it!	Second Anniversary
Knee replacement Always read the fine print before signing.	Piggy bank wine tasting See other cartoons and merchandise at www.cafepress.com/qlowntown.	The cat and the computer For cat lovers, cat haters, and computer users alike.	Jolly Green Giant He usually wears Fruit of the Loom.
Elf storage A place for everything	Christmas Armaments O Tannenbomb, o tannenbomb...	Idear Inspiration!	Find the normal guy in the midst of the clowns. There is one "normal" person in this group--he's not a clown or an animal. he's also pretty freaked out to be here. Can you find him? A full-color version of the website background.
"I'm with Stupid" cartoon Order this T shirt to laugh at someone else--or order our "I'm with Stupid" companion shirt in which you can be the butt of your own joke!	I'm with Stupid The color ran on the middle word! (When you have a choice, be sure to order the shirt in the color shown. Runny blue lettering on a pink shirt, for example, won't look right.)	Russian ukelele You should see the size of the case for his amp!	General's medals Hey, whatever you're good at---display it with pride.
She gave up coffee Cafe. Ole!	Dog marking his territory Cats spray, too.	Arthritis You get the same message on the Incontinence hotline, too!	Not as young as I used to be ...accepting what you cannot change...
Mad dog Fear of froth	This Old Napkin The home improvement comic strip	Pies on Earth Have a holly jolly cream pie!	Chaos theory Actually, it's a fact.
First day of winter Happy Dumpty	Church pledging Irredeemable	Little drummer boy Pa rum pum pum pum solo	Christmas children Christmas is for children.
Writing on the wall It's a Christmas debacle!	Elastic Man Super prank!	Inflatable Santa A lot of deflated kids!	Lassie A hoarse dog
Persecution complex Treated like a dog	Good head Loving but honest parents	Happy Franksgiving 'Dog Day	Cigarette butt Use your ashtray!
Rabbits multiplying Part of the hare raising process	Walk to school M.C. Extra effort	Anything Goes All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely clowns...	Biscuit costume At yeast he found a job...
Dip in road Ballroad dancing	Banana truck Yellow alert!	Lon Chaney museum Those Bram kids!	Hack O'Lantern ..or gag o'lantern
Mr. Hurd Everybody looks good at least one day a year.	Cologne ads Looks dirty but smells great!	Toot fairy Reed in bed	Tin Man ...and soon the strawman will be composted.
Mona Lisa Gold frame included at no extra charge!	Fish jokes Yes, it's a fish story.	Glasses It happens to everyone.	Merengue ..and maybe some maple waltznut pie...
Garth Vader May the fans be with you.	Old idea For a caveman, it was just a fire.	Importance At least he got a whole Sunday cartoon panel to himself.	Regimen Regime Yes, this actually appeared in a national magazine.
Switch Charging off to work	Dinner speaker Lacks focus	Gingerbread man Bite me!	Dating Old enough to be her history teacher
Buried in work You can't take it with you--nor would you want to.	That look in your eye He's shallow because he has bad depth perception.	Dogs in car Let speeding dogs drive.	Lifeboat valve Getting nowhere fast.
Mermaid Mir-ick!-le bra	Kick Me Butt it's just a joke.	The Lute Not the sharpest note on the staff...	Fowl on Chickie ...and they always call a horse-collar on No. 44, Trigger.
Cinderella The earliest example of "pimp my ride".	Gravestone The kingdom of Heaven is like a shiny countertop...	DWI "Toy boat" would've been better.	Shirt buttoned incorrectly Out of alignment, that's all.
Nooks and crannies Old house, old ladies	Traffic signals Offensive vs. defensive	Hunchback ...and he has a ringing in his ears.	I Doctor C your doctor regularly.
Negative Positively frustrating	Beware of Dog The dog is armed.	Hot logs Dam fine food.	You Are Here Well, now he's close enough to read it.
Snake in a bar It bites to get hit on.	Ship on shoulder Fight!	Family Circus And you always thought those kids were cute and innocent.	Clipboard Hammer time!
Elephant Don't forget to order extra shirts.	Reading candle Good thing he didn't have a mustache.	Qlowns on mugs What a perfect gift! A mug with a picture of a guy holding a mug with a picture of himself holding a mug with a picture of himself holding...	Cut the Cheese Makes scents.
Foxhole false alarm An inflated threat	The Three Stogies Moe, Larry and Cuban	Flower picking This is why you shouldn't pick flowers in public places.	Digital signature Roboshop
Origami World They tend to crash.	Hot donuts Recycled food tends not to be popular, although it is ecologically responsible...	Redemption Save this cartoon.	Ratty-looking suit And his hair looks mousy.
Seaside painter No wonder it looks so real!	Open mic Note the homage to Edvard Munch's "The Scream".	The Boise of Summer ...and at the plate, Spud Williams.	Diving Speed limit measured in knots
Problem What's the solution?	Hot dogs Cooking up trouble, frankly	Whoopie cushions ...and when help arrives, they can power themselves over to the rescue boat.	Magnetic brakes Guess she knows her necklace isn't real platinum now...
GM Recovery Plan Auto addiction	QlownTown team player The official QlownTown team sports logo!	You wanna go where everybody knows you're inane. The official QlownTown logo, with the unofficial QlownTown slogan	Darts ...and the bell bottoms are noisy.
Bluebird of Happiness She was here a minute ago...	Mr. Binkles grilling Our most popular image! Available in two forms, depending on the item.	Nerdvana Social notworking	Harry ...although their potions are very cheap.
Go out for Mexican Self serve	Mick Jagger Mr. Jagger is seen here as a rolling Stone.	Green Hummer They're probably not even available in this color.	Strong, silent type Macho, macho mime
Stirring music Simmer three hours on the Bach burner.	Ennui Unnecessary assistance	Dog buried Mr. P. Head Should've buried a Monopoly game.	Bees He'll bee right back.
Hamper Constructive criticism	Facelift ...and the air is thinner up there.	Davy Crockett Born on a mountaintop in Tennessee...	Hands through your hair The end of a hair-a
Beach bod Fun with Sandy	Macho grilling And he keeps the car running when he pumps gas!	Sunday morning guests Pushing the wrong buttons	Wicked witch A tragic sports accident
Trails The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry/when faced with such distractions as ice cream or pizza pie.	The World's Most Talented Mime And, he goes home after the performance in a mimed car.	Ties that Bind Similar thing happens if you pledge too much money to church--the tithes that bind, you know...	Appreciation Seminar Wear this shirt to your next seminar or training session.
Declaration Founding fathers fun	Applesauce A new twist on an old saying	Honey Do I don't think changing the title of the list actually gets him out of doing the stuff...	Out! Playing ball in a comic strip
Cheap Fourth of July Less damage to their hearing...	Sidewalk trap doors Needs some reworking.	Beach dreams It all depends on your point of view...	Getaway clown car Hurry!
Duck! It's like the boy who cried "duck"--unfortunately, for the duck.	Sand in the face Sandy Claus	Out to Lunge ?	Hooves You may not have encountered horses in your business, but you've certainly dealt with horse's..well, you know.
Pirate laundry A clean pirate is a happy pirate.	Lifeboat Things are going swimmingly.	Claw-foot sofa The crouch behind the couch	Alien, the QlownTown version Good for a belly laugh.
Twins Their mother is Helena Handbucket	Grammar Policeman One last time...maybe.	Bull in a butcher shop Comeuppance coming up...	Yummo Food Co. So much for eating your own product...
Notched gun You're supposed to notch the HANDLE, fella!	Faust class Always read the fine print.	Moses WTD?	Frosty S'no hope left.
Global witching Fly responsibly!	The Invisible Man Power corrupts.	Bottles of beer Must be Bock beer--Bock, like an Egyptian.	Disrespected Respect the cartoon.
Adapted Poor Timmy will always be shorter than the others.	Lobsters Hot tub hijinks	Clown car air bags Hey, clown cars need safety features, too.	James Gang Qowboys
Bob's Meats Bad location location location	Muscle shirt ...so he gave her legwarmers.	Leaving Howard ...and he's too manipulative.	Postponing the inedible The perfect gift for the dog--or dog owner--in your life!
Stop The perfect gift for the romantically inclined!	Baited breath He is, of course, telling her a fish story.	Judging the wine Communion	Cubist woman First impressionism...the ideal gift for artists or art students.
Legs Kathy's a clown. (It's an Everly Brothers reference. Look it up.)	Contacts in space ...and oh! the cost!	Umbrella Manly!	Katz & wife Married for love?
American Idle What a winner.	Prius envy ...and it'll only get worse as gas prices go up again.	Michelin Man Their meetings seem to go nowhere.	The Incredible Shrinking Man A dyin' shame
Chip on shoulder A simple misunderstanding	Snorkel I wouldn't want to breathing through that thing.	Heart on sleeve Sensitive soul	Praying for guidance Mars/Venus
Dead end Funny how that happens.	Dramatic sheep ...and she's performing in the middle of Sally Field.	Shipping charges Home delivery	Raptors Dinosaur Dad
Black Lagoon Substitutes never get a fair shake...	Afraid of clowns The worries of expectant parents...	Annual Flower Show Clowns and flowers...	Bears An unscheduled lunch!
Black cheep Watch out for this type.	cartoons in Heaven It all depends on your point of view...	CD burner CD burner disaster--laser gone wild!	Clown mobsters Clown mobsters
Conscience hoops Ya play with what you've got...	Crossword duck Or, Grammer's Son	Cutthroat negotiator Negotiations	Donuts Hard to pay attention with fresh donuts around.
Dracula Nothing good is developing!	Duck sauce It's not really made of...	Ducks in a Row He's just getting his ducks in a row--but what's with the cannon?	Early Clown Pies Before the cream pie, there were rocks. The evolution of comedy has not always been pretty.
Eponymous Eponymous the Clown	Faberge Faberge eggs and bacon	Golf caddy Golf caddy	Gulls Guy and a gull in a bar...
Hay Hay Hay The tragic end...	Honoring commitments Responsibleness	Imminent collision Inevitability	Jack Sprat Dinner disaster
Jojoba's witnesses Potion Proselytizers	Mini golf Ooh, what a mistake...	Nose? You put your nose down for a minute...	Nudist resort Naked humor
Pebbles That's gotta hurt.	Pie Where's a car with pie bags when you need one?	Prehistoric discovery Evidence of early clown behavior	Puce All we are saying...
Qlownfish Qlownfish, of course.	Rental Returns Rental returns	Running away to join the corporate world Disgruntled little Johnny surprises his clown parents by announcing...	Save the whales Not everyone is environmentally responsible.
Sid Communication breakdown	Take me seriously The first online QlownTown strip ever.	Texas chainsaw Foiled!	The Evolvolation of Language Improper English usage is addressed--and perpetuated.
Typist Able assistant