DST & the Space Time Continuum As a flying saucer shakes a space alien says, “Damn. Every time they change to and from Daylight Saving Time on Earth, it effects the space time continuum.” |
|
Murphy Beds and DST “Fred hated springing forward when Daylight Saving Time begins.” A Murphy bed has sprung forward and smashed a fellow into a wall. |
|||
Springing Forward at Stonehenge A druid says to another who's just moved a tall stone, "You got it wrong again. It's spring ahead, fall back.” |
Never Change to DST “Fred never wastes time changing clocks to & from Daylight Saving time.” A man has three clocks each an hour different from each other. |
|
|||
Lighthouse Christmas Lights A lighthouse has Christmas lights wrapped around it. “May there be light in your life.” |
|
Rudolph the Cabbie Rudolph driving a taxi explaining, “I was considered a part time employee since I only worked one night a year and thus wasn’t eligible for the pension plan, so here I am in my golden years.” |
|||
Santa & Lead Toys Santa hanging from an over loaded sleigh that slid off a roof grumbling “@#$%&* Lead Toys!” |
Only 1 Partridge in a Pear Tree? A woman surrounded by everything in the 12 nights of Christmas says to a man, "Only one Partridge in a pear tree? Mr. Jones next door gave his true love two partridges." |
Hybrid Sled “While Santa’s Hybrid Sled has made environmentalists and animal rights activists happy, there isn’t much room left for toys.” Santa and Rudolph sit atop a humongous bizarre gizmo in a sled. |
|||
Rudolph’s Drug Test “Rudolph, his nose so bright goes in for his drug test.” A reindeer in a bathroom stall with a cup. |
Reindeer Poker Games Reindeer playing poker. "What were those reindeer games that the other reindeer wouldn't let poor Rudolph join in?" |
Reindeer Droppings As Santa's reindeer fly overhead a man looking up while clutching an umbrella says: "Bah, humbug. As if worrying about pigeon droppings weren't bad enough." |
|||
Santa Under New Management Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer sitting in the sleigh sipping a glass of wine while Santa pulling the sleigh while riding a bike with training wheels. “Under New Management.” |
Rudolph Deciding on a Nose Rudolph looking at red noses, blue noses, green noses and thinking, "Decisions, decisions, decisions." |
When Reindeer go on Strike Santa on a Razor Scooter says, "I'm not trying to be hip. The reindeer went on strike." |
|||
Modern Day Christmas Carolers “Modern Day Christmas Carolers.” A lone fellow standing at a door with a large boom box. |
|
Resolve to no Longer Suffer in Silence A bundled up woman inside a house saying to man on December 31, “My New Year’s resolution? To no longer suffer in silence. I will moan, whimper, and complain until you resolve to get the heater fixed. |
|||
Resolve to Resolve Someone at a party says, “My New Year's resolution? To come up with some resolutions for the year after next.” |
Chinese New Year’s Resolutions “I don't believe in enacting my New Year's resolutions until Chinese New Year ... and I have no idea when that is.” |
Too Imperfect for Resolutions Someone at a party says, “I can't come up with any New Year's resolutions. It's not that I'm perfect, but that I'm so imperfect that I can't possibly give up anything.” |
|||
Turkey Needs to Retire A turkey in November in an employment office saying, "I know I don’t have much saved up, but I really need to retire before the end of the month." |
Purchase apparel and merchandise
