The Change Orders A contractor looking at "The Contract" a one page document. "The Change Orders" is a stack of paper several feet high. |
Port-a-John & TP A hand from a Port-a-John desperately reaching for a roll of toilet paper as it rolls away. |
Electrician’s Tomb The “Tomb of the Unknown Electrician." A general salutes a huge electric socket with legs sticking out of it. |
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Zapped Inspector When a building inspector is zapped and lighting up, an electrician asks, "What makes you think this room wasn't wired properly?" |
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Remember, You Repaired it Last A man saying to an electrician repairing an air conditioner, "Before you say it's got some old wiring, remember you repaired it last." |
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Humming vs. Singing Air Conditioners An HVAC repairman surrounded by parts and a dismantled air conditioner says, “It was humming. What did you expect me to do? Teach it the words?” |
Equal Opportunity Wrecking Co. A foreman saying to a man in a wheelchair equipped with a wrecking ball, "Why, yes, we are an equal opportunity wrecking company." |
Dungeons & Radon Man hanging in dungeon saying to cell mate, "I hope they've checked this place for radon." |
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SPF 1000 Sun Block Dracula in front of a bulldozer applies a lotion, "SPF 1000, the Sun Block preferred by 9 out of 10 vampires who work on road crews." |
Little Dutch Boy Labor Violation An inspector looking at the little Dutch Boy with his finger in the Dike saying, "This violates at least a dozen child labor laws." |
Devil & Fire Regs A Devil in Hell with fire sprinklers dousing flames saying, "Damn these sprinklers and government fire regulations." |
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Lo Cal Wood Only An inspector saying to a witch in front of a gingerbread house, "Sorry, but you're in violation of building codes. You can only use lo-cal hi-fiber wood here." |
Construction Lite A building under construction with a sign, "Construction Lite, 1/3 less 2 X 4s than our regular construction." |
Environmentally Sound House A carpenter building a house saying, “This will be an environmentally sound house built entirely from trees that fell over naturally from old age.” |
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I hate it When They Start W/O Us A plumber looking at someone who has half his body in a water pump with water shooting everywhere says to his assistant, "I hate it when they start without us." |
Oooops on the Job Site A carpenter putting siding on vertically as another puts it on horizontally. As they meet at a corner they say, "Oooops." |
Without Technical Plans A smiling contractor in front of a building that's lopsided and has obvious problems saying to an inspector, "And I did it without any technical plans." |
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He Can Still Hold a Hammer A man is carried away on a stretcher with a hammer stuck in his bandaged arm that is erect. His foreman says, "Take him back to work. He can still hold a hammer." |
Converting feet into dog feet A dog working as a carpenter measuring a piece of lumber and saying, "I need a 10 foot board. That's 70 feet in dog feet." |
Dinosaurs & Wet Cement "Theory #243 on how fossils were made." A dinosaur steps on a sidewalk with a “Wet cement” sign. |
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Eat the Electrician A lion in an apartment saying to his mate, “Instead of hunting gazelle tonight, let's call maintenance, say we have a short and eat the electrician when he arrives.” |
AC/DC Island A man stranded on an island seeing air conditioners wash on shore and saying, "Oh great. They need AC and I've got DC." |
Build a home where the buffalo roam? Buffalo running through a construction site and a man saying, "Build a home where the buffalo roam? Bah!" |
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Code Violations? A contractor in front of a building that's lopsided and has obvious problems saying to an inspector, “What code violations?” |
Organic Soldering "Organic Soldering." A dragon working with an air conditioner breathes fire on wire. |
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Where's Global Warming A freezing construction worker asking, "Where is global warming when you want it?" |
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