Cool Cat tshirts : Funny One Liners

So waddya wanna say? Tongue-in-cheek. Funny. Cool. Crazy. Smooth. Sarcastic. Wicked. You know you wanna say it. So say it with a funny tshirt!

A closed mouth A closed mouth gathers no foot	Dancing is an expression Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.	I pretend to work I pretend to work and they pretend to pay me.
SHUT UP Until I was 13 I thought my name was SHUT UP!	Dyslexic Pop Corn Don't ask a dyslexic to sell pop corn.	Never underestimate stupid people Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups.
If at first you dont succeed If at first you don't succeed, QUIT skydiving!	Love may be blind Love may be blind, but marriage can be a real eye-opener!	PANIC If at first you don't succeed, PANIC!
Nobodys perfect I'm a Nobody. Nobody's perfect. Therefore I am perfect!	Ask me no questions Ask me no questions. I'll tell you no lies.	During PMS Warning! During PMS, the person wearing this tshirt can go from zero to bitch in 5.3 seconds. Don't Diss Me!
He who laughs last He who laughs last thinks the slowest.	If at first you dont succeed If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.	Chaos. Panic. Disorder. Chaos. Panic. Disorder. My work here is done!
Tried sniffing coke I tried sniffing coke once, but the ice cubes kept getting stuck in my nose.	Dont piss me off Dont piss me off. I'm running out of places to hide the bodies.	A closed mouth A closed mouth gathers no foot.
Problems with fractions 5 out of 4 people have problems with fractions.	Used Bo Te Dyslexic I'm cured! I used bo te dyslexic.	Insanity is inherited Insanity is inherited. You get it from your kids.
A man who farts A man who farts in church sits in his own pew.	I smile because I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on!	Not a complete idiot I'm not a complete idiot, some parts are missing!
Cheeseburger in each hand A balanced diet is a cheeseburger in each hand.